eBay Sinks to an All-New Low

Now on to the morbid, but true, all-new low eBay has hit. And when I say “hit,” I mean rock bottom. It seems that Manny Ramirez’s Chrysler isn’t the only Red Sox item up for grabs on the popular site. Manager, Terry Francona’s, ABC (already been chewed) bubble gum made its way onto the net. The seller of the saliva-infested item claims she got it from the dugout shortly after the close of Game 1 of the World Series.

Here’s the description the seller provided:
"You are bidding on a very unique piece of sports memorabilia. This is an actual game used piece of chewing tobacco chewed by Red Sox manager Terry Francona during Game 1 of the 2007 World Series at Fenway Park versus the Colorado Rockies. The piece of tobacco is intertwined with a piece of bubble gum. Several pictures are posted below as proof of this item’s authenticity. This item was taken right from the seat of Terry Francona as seen in picture 4. A portion of all proceeds will be donated to the Jimmy Fund. Paypal is preferred. Checks and money orders are accepted, but the item will not be shipped until the check clears (usually 3-5 business days). Check out my 100% positive feedback score. This item will be shipped with insurance and confirmation. All is included in the shipping costs. Thank you for viewing my item. Good luck bidding
There is an upside to this, for lack of a better word, “gross” story. eBay removed the item from its site, citing that it contained tobacco in it."

The gum looks more like a shriveled up kidney to me! You be the judge if you didn’t already heave.

He's Baaaack...

Manny’s at it again y’all! The major league slugger has recently put his souped up, chromed out Chrysler 300 SRT8 on the auction block. At the moment, the current bid is $28,900. The lucky purchaser will not only receive the blinged out car, but a complimentary day with Manny and all five feet of his dreadlocks… just kidding groupies!

Jerry Nasif of West Roxbury Motors said that the highest bidder will not only get the hot rod, but “a trunk full of autographed items, a jersey, bat and ball, four tickets to a future Red Sox game and a meet-and-greet with Manny to talk about the car.”

Don’t bet your whole life’s savings this time sharpie Red Sox fans!

eBay Disses Manny

eBay has officially taken Manny Ramirez’s gas grill of the market after over zealous Red Sox fans bid their life savings all for a taste of a big, fat, juicy burger grilled on the appliance previously owned by the slugger.

The gas grill, originally purchased by the major leaguer for $4,000 and used once, was taken off the auction block earlier this year.

The minimum bid for the elaborate grill was $3,000, but the bidding soon got out of hand, sky rocketing all the way up to $100 million.

The Associated Press reported that when asked why he was selling the appliance, Ramirez responded with a smirk, “I need the money.” He also guaranteed a personally signed baseball for the lucky bidder.

It was later revealed that Ramirez was lending a helping hand to his neighbor, who originally owned the grill.

More on the “grill caper” here: http://www.boston.com/sports/baseball/redsox/extras/extra_bases/2007/03/manny_grill_off.html

Cythnia Drops the B-Bomb

Alex Rodriguez, 32, and his wife, Cynthia, 34, are expecting the arrival of their second bundle of joy this spring. The couple revealed the exciting news exclusively to PEOPLE magazine.

Here’s what the couple had to say regarding the news:

“Cynthia and I are overjoyed to announce this addition to our family,” said the future hall of famer. “We realize what a special gift children are, and feel very blessed to welcome our second child.”

“I feel great!” Cynthia proclaimed, divulging that the pair is yet to learn the sex of the baby, but plans to as soon as possible. “My daughter wants to know more than we do!”

“We’re just real excited,” she added. “It’s almost more exciting [than the first child] in a way, because you can anticipate what you already know is so amazing. We’re thrilled. We can’t wait.”

A-Rod's Mob Connection

Whenever A-Rod feels the need to “opt-out” of an unfavorable situation or location, he can now do so on his shiny new mafia jet. The former Yankees slugger has just purchased a Gulfstream jet from a hotel entrepreneur whose nearest and dearest is allegedly linked to the Russian mob, a trusty source informed the New York Post.

According to The Post, “The seller of the Gulfstream IV was Arik Kislin, a principal in Manhattan's Hotel Gansevoort, whose former company once sponsored a visa sought by an alleged hit man, and whose uncle was named by the FBI as being an associate of the Brighton Beach-based Russian mob.”

Rodriguez vehemently denies such a purchase, however his handy dandy pilot, Craig Frost, says otherwise. Frost has confirmed that both he and Rodriguez purchased the plush 16- passenger plane in a partnership sometime in September.

"We've been looking for some time, and it happened to be the best plane on the market for the money," Frost said.

Frost revealed that the plane will not just be used to tote the jet setting major leaguer around, but will also be chartered out. Although Frost dished about that, he remained mum on how much was shelled out to acquire the Gulfstream.

The jet’s tail number has already been customized to A-Rod’s liking. It reads, N113AR - Rodriguez's number, 13, and his initials.

I wonder if Joslyn Morse will be a regular passenger.

Sleep with Derek and Get Free Parking!

It seems that the perks for hooking up with baseball all-star Derek Jeter are rather skimpy… one night of free parking, that is after you put on a huge scene to claim your only endowment, or should I say gratuity?

According to the New York Post, a Page Six source strategically positioned in the lobby of Miami’s ultra-luxurious Shore Club, spied “two scantily clad women screaming at the front desk because they had spent the night at Jeter's penthouse and were then charged for parking.”

“The girls were wearing what looked like the same clothes they wore the night before — a tight cocktail dress and a miniskirt,” the top-secret source added. “They were making a huge scene because they were asked to pay for parking.”

The privileged insider also overheard one of Derek’s tarts wailing on a telephone, saying, “After last night, he’d better [bleep]ing take care of it!” Wonder what she was implying?

The two mystery women left with all smiles, reports the mole. Derek probably flashed his American Express black card and sent the girls on their merry way. Ahhh… so many baseball players, so little time! What is a girl to do?

When Baseball Athletes and Celebs Cross Paths

Did you hear the recent news of one of Hollywood’s brightest starlets’ latest STD contraction? I know what you're thinking: Isn't this supposed to be about baseball? Well, after 2 hits, 3 RBIs, and one stolen base, one of baseball’s most eligible bachelors gave one of People’s 50 Most Beautiful the gift that keeps on giving.

So it has been confirmed from the starlet’s less-than-loyal former assistant that she was filling prescriptions for the “Take Charge” once daily purple pill. Furthermore, spilling the intimate details regarding the star’s fornication experiences with the MLB all-star.

Hopefully this does not affect their professional careers... I mean, amid a tight pennant race, last thing we need is the baseball hunk on the DL because his crotch is as irritated as Lindsey Lohan's dye job.

On the other end, the up-and-coming starlet’s career as an actress is just beginning to take off, soon to be releasing a film with a notorious celebrity-dater funnyman. Word is there is a love scene between the two actors. Lets just hope jock-itch-like symptoms are not experienced by the jokester.

Adrenalin-fueled stolen bases, intense base slides, immense perspiration caused by the pressure of a full count with two on and two out with runners in scoring position, baseball athletes can become quite dirty in the line of duty. You would think such raunchiness would be limited to the diamond!